How to Help Young Men

Victor Joecks
Mon, 06 Apr 2026 09:27:41 -0700
Opinion

Society has done a terrible job guiding teenage boys as they grow into men.

Local communities and society more broadly have something important to offer teenagers — guidance. A 15-year-old has never been 35 or 45. Swamped with hormones and a still-developing brain, he has a poor understanding of what he'll want in the future.

This is why societies have long pushed young people toward desirable long-term outcomes. It helps both the individual and the broader community. This arrangement even benefits those who don't follow the norms. They better understand what the trade-offs will be for leaving the prescribed path.
Updated: Mon Apr 06, 2026

Society has done a terrible job guiding teenage boys as they grow into men.

Local communities and society more broadly have something important to offer teenagers — guidance. A 15-year-old has never been 35 or 45. Swamped with hormones and a still-developing brain, he has a poor understanding of what he'll want in the future.

This is why societies have long pushed young people toward desirable long-term outcomes. It helps both the individual and the broader community. This arrangement even benefits those who don't follow the norms. They better understand what the trade-offs will be for leaving the prescribed path.

Keep this in mind as you consider the plight of young men. They're struggling. In 1950, the labor force participation rate among men ages 25 to 34 was 96%. In February, it was just 85.3%. More than 19% of men in that age range lived at home in 2025. That's up from 13.7% in 1983.

Suicide rates for men ages 25 to 34 are up 30% since 2010. Male drug overdose deaths were higher in 2024 than in 2014.

In 1980, the median age for a man's first marriage was around 25. Now, it's over 30. The average age of first-time fathers has gone from under 28 in 1980 to over 31 today. Homeownership is increasingly out of reach.

Two things can be true at once. Every man is responsible for his own decisions, and these statistics show society is failing to successfully shepherd young men to adulthood.

It starts with the breakdown of the family. Marriage keeps moms and dads together, and dads are vital for boys. But for decades, backed by the welfare state, society has undermined this bedrock institution.

The next problem is the belief that differences between boys and girls come from societal conditioning, not biological differences. Young boys mature later than girls. Yet they generally both start kindergarten at the same age. Classrooms involve a lot of sitting. Not great for rambunctious boys. Instead of extra recess, boys receive Ritalin. Boys are around twice as likely as girls to be told they have ADHD. Fatherless boys are less likely to have male teachers than in the past.

Look at the messages boys receive both in school and society. Boys' inclination toward math isn't celebrated and nurtured. It's viewed as further proof of the power of the patriarchy. The education blob celebrates girls in STEM. "The future is female" is a popular slogan. Masculinity, however, is smeared as toxic.

Little wonder that many young men have withdrawn. Pornography has replaced dating and marriage. Online gambling offers easily accessible thrills. The manosphere provides a superficial community and a cartoonish version of masculinity.

Society can fix this, but it won't be easy. The root of this poisoned fruit is modern feminism. This worldview must be weeded out of institution after institution.

Marriage should be held up as the ideal, not penalized. If a man gets a woman pregnant, society should expect him to marry the mother. Allowing men to avoid the obvious responsibility that accompanies premarital sex has been a disaster for millions of children.

Some boys should start school later. Boys need three recesses a day, not one. They need male-only organizations, like the Boy Scouts, not Scouting America. Boys should learn that their natural aggression and competitiveness are gifts to harness, not ailments to cure. Put young men on a mission. Tell them that their country, local communities and future families need their strength and determination to build and create. Help teen boys by eliminating their access to pornography and online betting.

These ideas may seem radical, but they're not new. Society once used them to successfully help boys become good men. It's time to do it again.